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I am finally getting around to answering Laura's "Who would you see in Heaven?" question. I gave one set of answers to her and I gave something slightly different to Rachel. I don't exactly remember what I said to either of them, so I am going to give something new.
1. My Grandma - In the five years leading up to her death, my grandmother became a very different woman. She was no longer sitting on the radiator in the winter or sitting at the dining room table crocheting, but had become instead a woman that could not stand or walk on her own, a woman that could not remember her family. In heaven, I would see her sitting on her porch back home. We would sit on the swing or the glider and we would drink homemade iced tea. The lesson that she would teach me is that it is impossible to predict the future and is therefore futile. A favorite saying of hers in life was "You never know what you are going to get", and I think that, in heaven, she would elaborate more on this topic. 2. Micki - Micki was my best friend for 9 years. We were practically joined at the hip in school and spent nearly every waking moment together outside of school. She was more like a sister than a friend to me. In fact, we fought like sisters. It was in eighth grade that everything hit the fan and we started to pull away from the bond that we had once shared. I cried so often that year when I realized that I was losing my best friend. My friendship with her was one of the most frustrating and at the same time wonderful parts of my life. Today, we are not the best friends we once were, but she is one of the closest things to a sister I will ever have. In heaven, I would see Micki sitting on the floor of their den back when all that was in there was the carpeting (Micki's dad was redoing the den for years). This was an awesome place to play "House", for we could furnish it with blankets however we wanted. We would sit on the floor of the den and I would understand what kind of friend it is that I would want to be and what it was that I should look for in my friends. 3. Katie J. - When I was in eighth grade, I took an Algebra class after school at St. Joe's. As I said already, eighth grade was a difficult period in my life because my best-friendship was unraveling and I couldn't stop it. Katie J. was in that Algebra class and I don't know that I would have gotten through it without her help. We used to write long letters to each other (sometimes during class) about how we felt so much different we felt. Interestingly enough, I kept every letter she ever wrote me. I guess we were considered the freaks of the class, for we weren't interested in the pop culture so much as we were interested in "The X-Files" and things of that nature. I would pull out the letters and we would probably talk about how rough that time in our lives was.If I were to see Katie in heaven, we would be sitting in that classroom and she would teach me that it is okay to be my own person, that I don't have to conform. 4. Kenny - I can't put into words how much I have already learned from him, but I don't know that this list would be complete without Kenny. He has brought out so many new emotions that I didn't think were possible. I have wanted to scream at him and hug him in the same instant. I've wanted to forget about him and yet he is forever on my mind. Kenny would be playing piano in my heaven, for I always feel so incredible while listening to him play. In fact, we probably wouldn't talk much in this heaven of mine. We would be sitting in a room (maybe a practice room) and he would just play. Whatever he played, it would perfectly describe what it was that he was trying to say. I just hope that I would understand what he was saying. 5. The last person I would see in this heaven would probably not stop to talk to me. In fact, I don't know that He would even recognize me. I would want to see My Father in my heaven. To have Him walk past me and not even acknowledge my existence would teach me that there are some things that I need to forgive and move on from. I have a lot of issues with Him, and I think that seeing Him would give me the closure I would need.
and if every window pane should shatter David Gray, "Falling Free" |